Hey folks..

How are you doing these days. Still coronavirus weather… yeaa i guess it is the normal that we are all have to adapt as normal.

So.. do you have any plan that being cancel or you can do the plan as its the way it is?

Me… my plan not exactly happen as i planned. As my expectation, as i imagine, as i picture it, all the blocks go down as well. Pretty well. This situation is so forking overwhelming my mind.

I was planning to go up, survive. Last year was not the best my year. So i thought, i have to pay all of the thing this year. But this year… i don’t know, maybe The universe is trying to tell me not in a rush. Also it brings me down. I lost in the process. The feeling of scared, nervous, doubting myself “can i do this?”

This question lingers in my mind.

I realized, this is the lack of my confidence. I am afraid of failure. While it did not happen. Yet.

I force myself in it, to work on it at best. But all i can think now is the outcome. “Will it work?”

I lost in the process, and i am afraid. I am scared. This anxious feeling wraps myself.

I need to get some rest at the moment. I have to give myseld permission to flow with this feeling. Flow until it become good again. Not denial it.

I need to let myself more time for break, or i will break myself with the anxiety. Put aside the weight on my shoulder, and if i am ready, i have to continue my step. I know this anxiety will go away, it will not wrapping me anymore.

I just need to rest.

–Dearmariana–